martes, noviembre 01, 2005

FUTBOLINES, por Schillermann

Hace algunos días en la residencia -barracón del mononeuralismo infecto de la juventud mas puerilmente recalcitrante, dicho sea- mientras esperaba la cena pensaba en el motivo por el que había sido arrestado un maestro turco durante el genocidio armenio de 1915, que escrito en los informes del cuartel de la Gendarmería decía: “por ser instruido puede ser peligroso para la nación”. Así estaba reflexionando acerca del poder destructor que represento para imperios autócratas cuando me puse a mirar el futbolín de la sala de juegos. Nunca me ha gustado ese juego, más que nada por ser una rama de ese deporte alienador e instrumento de tiranos –invento patrio tenia que ser-­­­, pero también por el primitivismo de su manejo, por ruidoso, en fin. Aparte de esto, en todos los futbolines siempre me fijaba en ciertos detalles, y este no iba a ser una excepción. Me quedaba mirando sus desventuradas figuras, de facciones puntillescas y boca temblorosa, sus cuerpos toscos, paleolíticos, forjados por una mano holgazana y despreocupada, sus vestimentas pintadas sobre el metal con cierto desdén, pequeñas criaturas engendradas sin arte ni cariño, empalados por una barra metálica cuyo testimonio de dolor se refleja en sus rostros acongojados faltos de cualquier expresión alentadora, cuerpos a merced de la brutalidad de seres extraños que los voltean sin control y los golpean contra una esfera hasta que las entrañas del estadio se la guardan para el siguiente encuentro, encarcelados en un mueble pesado, antiguo, carcomido y grafiteado. Pobres jugadores, la antitesis de sus homólogos de carne y hueso, no hay división para calificar su inexistente talento ni importancia. Uno cuando los ve allí, sujetos a sus barras, condenados a girar como el objeto de una cacería de subsistencia gira sobre la hoguera, piensa en cierto modo la fortuna de ser libre, al menos, hasta cierto punto, pero después llega otro pensamiento, que le dice a uno mismo que no hace falta ser un vasto muñeco de metal malamente pintado e incrustado por una barra a una mesa igualmente impresentable, hay infinidad de clases de futbolines, todos estamos en ellos, estan los futbolines-cubículo, donde jugadores pintados de camiseta y pantalón baratos estan empalados a un ordenador atado a una mesa en forma de cuatro paredes prefabricadas, y el mozalbete que se divierte golpeándole tiene forma de hombre alto, etiquetado y encorbatado, o también estan los futbolines-multinacional, que teniendo gran variedad de jugadores, pintados de gran variedad de formas, pero teniendo en común su nula vistosidad, también disponen de cantidad de barras donde empalar, algunas son maquinas de coser, otras son un pico, otras una aguija y un pedazo de cuero, hay cantidad, así como también mesas de juego, sean cuartos hacinados o minas intoxicadas, pero la peculiaridad de estos es que el mozalbete siempre es el mismo. Caballeros, estoy complacido de haberles presentado una pequeña parte del inmenso catalogo de futbolines en nuestro mundo, escojan su preferido, o no lo hagan, la mayoría de ustedes terminara dentro de uno, ejerciendo el honroso empleo de satisfacer las ansias juguetonas del mozalbete de turno. Que remedio, caballeros, siempre habrá gente con monedas de 50 céntimos en la faltriquera.

49 comentarios:

Anónimo dijo...

Pués es cierto lo que usted dice señor Sillerman, nunca me había parado a pensarlo desde el ejemplo de los futbolines pero tiene su cruda lógica.
Muy bueno el post.

Von Schillermann dijo...

"TEST"

Aura dijo...

No ando con suficiente entusiasmo como para empuñar el mando y sacudir a estas pobres figuritas habitualmente impedidas: falta de un brazo, alguna pierna... Que les dejen tranquilos.
Saludos.

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